2026-09-03 - Living Letters - Returning to Our Nature
Lately, I have been thinking about the pace many of us call normal.
For years in Oakland, I woke up tired and already felt behind. I was doing meaningful work, surrounded by people I loved, and still, something in me felt trapped inside a life built around deadlines, bills, traffic, and the next thing that needed to happen. I did not have language for what my body was carrying then.
This Living Letter is less of a polished answer and more of a question I am still living into: What happens when the life we have built keeps asking the human animal to move against its own rhythm? If your foot has been on the gas for a long time, maybe some part of you will recognize this too.
Transcript:
Hi, friends. Happy September. Here we are, approaching fall.
So, this Living Letter might be a little messy. It might be all over the place because I’m still trying to wrap my head around it.
You know, as a practitioner, I am constantly drafting up my philosophy on my life, how I live, how I work with people, and how I facilitate. It’s an always-evolving philosophy.
Lately, I’ve been really interested in how modern society, particularly the modern American lifestyle, goes against our true nature as animals.
My philosophy is being formed by teachers like Peter Levine and Stephen Porges. Peter Levine is the founder and creator of Somatic Experiencing, and Stephen Porges is the researcher behind Polyvagal Theory.
A few years ago, I read Sapiens. The first part of that book is about how we’ve evolved from hunters and gatherers to agriculturalists and then industrialists.
I’m also interested in evolutionary biology and how our bodies have evolved over time based on our environment, but also how our bodies move through this world.
A couple of years ago, I read Jeff Krasno’s Good Stress, and his research, or maybe the way he has reiterated the research, has really helped me form some of my philosophy.
Right now, I’m reading a book by Dr. John La Puma called The Indoor Epidemic. The subtitle is 93% Inside Steals Sleep, Focus & Years. The 7% Outdoor Rx Restores Them.
I’ve been reflecting on my own life, particularly these last few years living here outside of America, living in Mexico, where my lifestyle is completely different.
I remember living in Oakland and waking up feeling tired, dreading work, and not wanting to get myself up. One, because I lost the meaning that I had in the work I was doing.
And then also personal meaning, because the work I was doing was really impactful in the communities, but I had lost the personal meaning in the work. That triggered emotional exhaustion for me, which then spiraled into behaviors and patterns that didn’t quite serve me: staying up late, drinking too much, partying on the weekends, and doing it all over again.
I was also surrounded by a community of go-getters, right?
The Bay Area is home to Silicon Valley. We are hustlers. We hustled. It was go, go, go, go. Let’s climb the corporate ladder.
At the time, I didn’t know how unsustainable it was. At the time, I didn’t know that I was waking up and immediately my body would dump out cortisol.
It’s quite clear how different my life is here in Mexico. My life is a lot slower. I have a lot more meaning in what I do for work.
And so I think what I’m trying to say is that I lived in a lifestyle that wasn’t conducive to my nature. I lived a lifestyle that actually rubbed against who I truly am as an animal.
Some of you might relate to this. Some of you might relate to the lack of meaning, the lack of energy in your life.
Maybe, in some ways, what I felt in the States was that I felt trapped. I didn’t know how to get out of it.
I didn’t know how to do something that I loved while also paying the bills, paying the insurance, the rent, and food. Right?
I understand that living in places like the Bay Area, New York City, Los Angeles, or even now places like Nashville or Houston, where the cost of living is increasing, makes this difficult.
I guess part of my point here, and I told you, this is a little all over the place, so if you’ve borne with me and you’re still here, thank you.
But I guess what I’m trying to say is that we weren’t meant to live in this high-pressure society.
We weren’t meant to live in a world where we are constantly thinking about deadlines. We’re constantly thinking about how to get food, pay for food, or pay for rent.
We’re not meant to be constantly living in a state of stress.
I often work with men who are burned out in their lives because they’ve had their foot on the gas pedal for years. This causes havoc in the physical body, not to mention the emotional toll it takes to be in a constant state of go, or maybe in a constant survival state.
You know, what we know today is that chronic stress leads to chronic illness and autoimmune diseases, but it also ultimately leads to early death. The impact that has on our own lives, but also on the people we touch and the people we love, is quite significant.
I don’t have the answer for you if you’ve experienced this.
Our answer was to move to a different country, where our lifestyle could completely change, where we could have space and rest, and where we could take care of ourselves. That was our answer.
I’m not sure what the answer is for you.
But I do know that if you are constantly living in a state of survival, you’re always going, you feel burned out, and your foot is always on the gas pedal, that’s not healthy for you.
You need a change. Something needs to shift in your life.
So, I’m still wrapping my head around my philosophy, right?
I mean, I’m doing this work. This is my life’s work. And so I am always going to be thinking about this. My philosophy around my life and how I work with my clients is always going to be evolving.
But what is clear to me in this philosophy is that we, as animals, need to come back to our own true nature.
Meeting deadlines constantly, sitting in traffic every day, and not having time to rest is going against our nature.
I would love to hear your thoughts on this and your reflections. Let me know if this resonates.
Sending you all big love.
Resources:
Somatic Experiencing developed by Dr. Peter Levine
The Polyvagal Theory by Dr. Stephen Porges
Sapiens by Yuval Noah Harari
Good Stress by Jeff Krasno
